cautious words follow because this is a post about my husband, and
as I have said before, the role of wife is one that I plan to succeed at 100
percent. so for him, i blog cautiously, but real today.
my husband is one
of the most social people i know, along with being incredibly motivated and
passionate. his love for life amazes me sometimes. he is also surprisingly
sensitive, but i suppose when you are as passionate as he is, your heart can
break easily. lately his heart is breaking often. i can see it is his eyes;
more frequently than not, there is a sadness there.
for the past few months i watched him throw himself into a ministry
about which he was ecstatic. and as time has passed and the project picked up
pace to a point where it consumed, and still consumes, more than half of our
free time, i saw his patience growing thin. he was discouraged easier. he angered
easily when we talk about it. it wore on his mind.
but it was not the time commitment or the lack of fruit in the
ministry that caused it. instead the disappointment came from leadership. when
leaders let us down, smother our voice, and micro-manage us, we feel
discouraged.
how do you minister when your Christian brothers and sisters
disappoint you with their lack of passion, their misplaced priorities, and
their self-centered attitudes? (this may seem like a judgment on my part, but regardless,
this is the way it feels. like when someone says something that comes off in a
harsh way, it feels harsh regardless of how it was meant.) it feels like they
do not care about your ideas, your help, or the mission.
this was where we stood. our first time able and called to serve
in this capacity, yet unwanted by our leaders.
all we could do was pray.
all we could do was pray.
we met God in His word and felt encouraged by His character. we focused
on the mission, rather than our own circumstance. we found comfort in 2 Timothy
1:11-12. “I was appointed to announce the good news. I was appointed to be an
apostle and a teacher. That’s why I’m suffering the way I am. But I’m not
ashamed. I know the one in whom I’ve placed my trust. I’m convinced that God is
powerful enough to protect what he has placed in my trust until that day.”
together, and through God, we will continue to share the good news
in this ministry. and regardless of how unimportant our leaders make us feel,
it will be good.
